I feel the strenuous mystery of my dual parentage; a son of Adam, yet born from above. Living in grace unmerited and mercy overflowing, longing for the Other, the Holy, the Whole; yet with mixture.
Adam is always with me: Bending, Twisting, Tainting even what is Incorruptible.
Christ is always with me: Redeeming, Purifying, Restoring. He is greater than Adam.
I hear my parents’ voices as they call me, as they name me. Who do I listen to? Who’s voice do I heed?
What am I to do? What do I have?
All I have is this present moment – this fulcrum where my future and my past meet in full force. Rushing headlong in all their might, colliding in this place called “now”. And I – I am caught in the middle; Caught between the full fury of my past, pulling me back; Decaying, Dirty, Broken, Forsaken; and the full glory of my future, pulling me forward: Renewed, Holy, Complete, Transformed.
I feel this strenuous mystery.
Often confused. Often assailed. Each voice calls me. Each voice names me. Who will I listen to? Who will I believe? What will I choose?
I will choose life. I will choose this messy, confusing, beautiful, glorious, heartbreaking joy called life.
Living between above and below, between what was and what will be I live with what is. It is here that life is found, here in the crossroads.
The only time to live is now. The only place to live is here, in the crossroads.
In this cacophonous moment, pulled above and pulled below, called forward and called backward, I choose life, because Life Himself has chosen me.
It is a beautiful mystery, living here in the crossroads.
Debbie and I serve as the FMI Global Associate Director for MENACA and Europe. We focus on cultivating disciples, leaders, and church planting movements.
