Is it possible to actually have an effective prayer life? Can you have a prayer life that calms your mind, expresses your heart, and feeds your soul because you have learned to hear His voice and let Him guide your steps? Yes! It is possible.
In this post I want to share with you what I have learned about prayer. This will be a very personal discussion.
The Two Sides of Prayer: Desperation and Friendship
- Prayer begins with desperation. Remember, Jesus said, “Without me you can do nothing…” When you know how desperate you are prayer is not a struggle.
- Prayer is based on our friendship with God. God delights in our fellowship. He welcomes us into his presence.
“Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” (Hebrews 4:16, ESV)
The Benefits of Prayer
Prayer has at least three key benefits:
- Enjoying fellowship with God.
- Exchanging my weakness for His strength, my need for His provision.
- Advancing His purposes in this world.
Here are Some Tools and Resources for Effective Prayer
- Unplug!
The Internet is a wonderful servant and a terrible master. I need to set a buffer between the World Wide Web and me. I get too distracted if I am online. It’s for this reason that I use a printed Bible, not a digital Bible like the ones on my iPad or my iPhone. If I use the digital version, I get too tempted and too distracted with checking email, Facebook, or surfing the web to follow up on some random thought that just popped into my head. For me to have an effective prayer time, I need to be unplugged.
- Get comfortable.
I wake up in the morning, make some French pressed coffee, and then sit in my favorite chair and begin a conversation with God. I call this my “Coffee with God.” Over the years I have cultivated such an awareness of His presence that this time is as real to me as having coffee with my wife or a close friend.
- The Word of God.
With my coffee in hand, I began my prayer time by reading a chapter from Proverbs. Proverbs has 31 chapters; so every day I read a chapter that corresponds with today’s date. So if today is July 3, I read Proverb 3. I’ve done this for years. I then spend time reading other passages of Scripture. Some people find reading through the Bible every year to be a very helpful discipline. This has been my general practice, except for the season I am in right now. Just over one year ago I became fascinated with the book of Romans. Since then I have been reading Romans over and over. Sometimes reading only one chapter a day, other times reading up to five chapters a day. The important thing is not “how much of the Bible did you read today?” But “How much of you did the Bible read today?” Reading one passage thoroughly and letting it speak to you in the depths of your being is far better than reading fifteen chapters of Leviticus in one setting.
- A Journal.
My biggest struggle in prayer is my overactive mind. I sit down to pray and a parade starts in my head. This used to frustrate and defeat me until I learned the secret of journaling. Journaling harnesses my thoughts and forces them to slow down and focus. Some people journal on their computer or tablet, I can’t do this. I get to distracted with all the other things I can do on my computer, like email, surf the net, or spend time on WasteBook, (I mean Facebook). Using pen and paper helps me slow down enough to hear from God.
- Convert Your Worry List into a Prayer List, Phil. 4:4-7
We all have our worry list: Money, marriage, kids, work, church, the economy: you name it, we worry about it. The Bible tells us in Philippians 4:4 – 7 to not worry about anything but pray about everything. In other words; convert your worry list into your prayer list. I list all the things I am worrying about in my journal, writing them down as prayer needs. I then pray through these items, claiming the promises of God for them, asking His wisdom and help, and casting my cares on to Him. I do this until the peace of God fills my heart.
- Write Down Actionable Items:
I have inserted a small stack of Post-it notes in the front of my journal. While journaling, praying, and reading Scripture ideas will pop into my head that I need to act on, it could be something as simple as pick up eggs and milk at the store to something as complicated as dealing with a relationship issue or personnel problem. I write these actionable items down on a Post-It Note. That get’s it of my mind and out of the way. I do not know if these are “nudges” from the Spirit of God or just my mind recalling things I need to follow up on (it is probably a mix of both). That doesn’t matter to me. What I have experienced is this is a very helpful practice that both increases my prayer effectiveness and daily productivity.
- Food for My Soul: A Book or Resource to Feed My Soul.
After spending time reading Scripture, journaling, and praying I spend time reading a book that is relevant to me at this season of my life. It could be a book dealing with productivity, spiritual disciple, a biography, history, a Bible commentary, how to be a better writer, or personal development. The critical thing is that the book be helpful for me at this juncture of my life.
The Effects of an Effective Prayer Life:
After years of developing this prayer life of mine, I have found it indispensible for:
- Calming my mind.
- Hearing His Word.
- Expressing my heart.
- Directing my steps.
- Feeding my soul.
Here are Some Tips for Getting Started:
Start where you are.
If you’ve never prayed for more than 10 minutes don’t wake up tomorrow and try to pray for two hours. Start where you are. If you never prayed more than 10 minutes, start there, then in a few days you may need to increase it to 15 minutes or maybe even 20 minutes. Get good at that and then if you need to increase it, go up to 25 or 30 minutes. The key is to start where you are. Don’t compare yourself to other people. Don’t do what you think you have to do in order to make God happy with you. Remember, God is your friend and He delights in spending time with you. He will never nag you into an effective and joyful prayer life. He will always invite you to a life of fellowship with Himself. Through practice you will find the right balance for how much time you need to spend in prayer.
Learn from the masters.
I’ve always enjoyed reading biographies of great men and women of God. One of the main things I look for “How do they cultivate their private prayer life.” When I learn something from them I ask myself, “Can I see me doing this?” “Can I try this?” If it seems to be a good fit for me, then I try it for a while, I imitate the masters, and through that I find what works for me.
Find your own path.
Your journey with Jesus will be different than my journey with Jesus. You may be a morning person, or a night person, someone who like it loud and rambunctious or someone who likes it quiet and contemplative. Find your own path with Jesus. Remember, He is your friend and He enjoys taking the journey with you. Be at peace with that.
Learning to spend time with God will enable you to
- Slow down enough to hear from God,
- Grow deep in your faith and thinking, and
- Live a life of significance.
The journey await you, let’s pray.
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Thank you so much for your prayers and support. Our ministry happens because of your partnership in the Gospel.
Debbie and I serve as the FMI Global Associate Director for MENACA and Europe. We focus on cultivating disciples, leaders, and church planting movements.
